Ask Meni

Impure thoughts about ….

admin — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 16:04:37 +0000

Q: Have you ever had impure thoughts about Tera M***ers ? Did you ever ? Juan via FB
Y: If you think, oral sex is impure, i’m guilty, but I also have thoughts about Tera, more pure thoughts, pure torture.

Hooking up at AVN awards?

admin — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 13:51:54 +0000

Q: Did Meni ever hook up with one at the AVN awards? (Juan via FB)
A: Oh boy, let me think, yes. One year Vegas resident who I knew from back in NH, she was like 16 when I was 25? so she must have been 22 or 23. (married ssshh). I made out with a Wicked Contract girl and thought I was getting more, then she came to her senses when her make up artist got a hold of her. Had a great time with PHX hottie who I seduced thru the magic of customer support email with clubjenna. she was cancelling her account, i noticed her email address was of a hot chick, we talked, agreed to meet in Vegas, and the magic happened in my boys from Montreal’s room in the Venetian, I had a clubjenna employee Dan sleeping in my room back at the Hard Rock so I asked my buddies from Montreal who were hanging in the center bar in the Venetian at around 2 am if I could “use” their room. They told me we could as long as we call the front for new sheets after. God I haven’t seen a pic of that chick since Myspace died.

Too Sexy?

admin — Thu, 14 Jul 2011 14:13:43 +0000

Q: meni, ive been told I’m too sexy, is there anything i can do to mitigate this issue? M.S. via FB
A: Hold on, 1. Make less severe, serious, or painful: “he wanted to mitigate misery in the world”. To me if you wanna be less sexy, tell me you like Glenn Beck, that kills my attraction to hot conservatives. Post stupid crap on Facebook like me, it seems to work.

Why is the sky blue?

admin — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 22:08:01 +0000

Q: “why is the sky blue” original question boy
A: “A clear cloudless day-time sky is blue because molecules in the air scatter blue light from the sun more than they scatter red
light. AND cuz Aliens are playing a movie in the sky, but we are on the other side of the screen, the screen backing is blue”

Tabledance

admin — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 22:05:03 +0000

Q: “what exactly is a tabledance? My boyfriend of two years went to a stripclub with his friends last summer and I just found out last week that he got a table dance. Should I be mad. He said they are nothing. I have no idea what goes on in those places and what girls do exactly.” some chick
A: “oh my god, tabledance? leave him! ok, ok, just fucking with you. Tabledance, she dances one song, at his table, depending on the state/town laws, maybe 3 foot mininum between customer and dancer, or maybe light contact. Now, a lap dance? they chick is grinding his cock as hard as she can to get him off, ask if it was a lapdance, and if so, who fucking cares, get over it you tramp!”

Fun on $15 a day in Raleigh

admin — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 22:00:30 +0000

Q: “Can you spend only $15.00 on the weekend and have fun in Raleigh North Carolina? What should I do? I’m writing a paper on spending only $15.00 for the weekend and suggestion on activities.” Bkr Raleigh”
A: “Sure you can. Buy the cheapest wine you can find, find a homeless lady, take her back to your house”

Friendship

admin — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 21:58:38 +0000

Q: “How do I get this brick out of my ass? Stoned
A: “Dude, why did you run out of my apt? come back over and I’ll remove the brick, then I will skull fuck you bro”

Incest

admin — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 21:54:43 +0000

Q: “is incest bad?” anonymous
A: “Its fun for the whole family”

Forward women

admin — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 21:54:04 +0000

Q: “Do men like forward women? I have a tendency to wink at men, touch them as I walk by, and sincerely compliment them. This never works with men I really like, but extremely attractive assholes respond by trying to get me to come home with them. Am I freaking out the nice guys? Should I change or just make the best of it and fuck the assholes? Kitten, IL
A: “Fuck the assholes, hurry. I like forward women. Nice guys do get freaked out, but why be with a nice guy? He’ll bore you, he probably sucks in bed, and he’s no challenge, a girl like you likes challenges”

Penis Size question

admin — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 21:51:24 +0000

Q: “”Meni, I’m really worrying about my penis size. Is my penis normal size? It’s max 4.5″” erect. help me! write and let me know what size is a normal penis, by it I can do intercourse, normally.” majazi/pakistan
A: “Bro you are only like 3/4 of an inch off the avg penis size. Don’t worry about it. You can’t do anything about it. Trim your pubes, might help the appearance of size. Work on your tongue, if you can lick the pussy right, you can win any woman. I won your sister that way, hee hee”