Relationships, from the past

Q: “I know for some years two girls they are cousins, one of which I always liked, but Your Ad Here never happened anything because she soon went abroad for studies and I also moved. I kept a remote contact with her cousin (easier to reach) and last month when i was back in city I arranged and all 3 of us went out to some club. Of course the primary motive was to meet her cousin again since I had lost contact and it was the only re-touch way. Also they haven’t seen each other for like 6 months…
At some point while everything was doing great, her cousin asked her what are her plans for her? upcoming engagement? That was the moment it’s like I got a punch from Tyson on his good days. I believe even her was kind of shocked, because it was like a ruin attempt or something like that. She kind of skipped to direct reply and stupid me I congratulated her (yeah the cool attitude lol). I got her new phone # and after few days she also sent me an sms with her email address. Month passed and I returned back to Cyprus. Shortly she sent me an email and a 2nd follow up the date her boyfriend had birthday. I found out the next day when I told her my birthday is tomorrow she told me that detail. She’s pretty warm in her emails, but again she emails me from her work, so possible she could be just bored and nothing else to do…. I’m not sure if she’s showing any interest and how I should proceed from this point.” S.R.

A: “Don’t mistake kindness with interest. Sorry, move along bro”

Q: “I Love my boyfriend more than anything. He came back into the picture at a bad time though. I told him in the beginning of our relationship that I was not looking for another long distance relationship. But he also loves me dearly and has no intention of letting go. I am going off to college for four years…should I stay with him?: ~Jeana WI~

A: “Forget him, JESUS, you are what? 18 years old? You love him more than anything? Go to college and have fun. You wanna be tied down to a long distance relationship while you are in college? LAME. Plus he’ll probably get laid while you are away.

Q: “I’ve been with my gf over a year and our sex life is dramatically slowing down. She doesn’t seem interest doing it with me anymore, and she has a lot of guy friends. She spend more of her time with her friends than me. So can you tell me what should I suspect if she is cheating? KYM
A: “Dude, she’s either cheating right now, or will, or will dump you. Sounds bad, she’s on her way out of your life.. Dump her first”

Q: “meni, i’ve caught my guy cheating 3 years ago (when we first started dating), but he swears that as the only time he actually had sex with someone else. BUT, i’ve snooped and caught him doing “lunch” with clients {talent agent), ex-girlfriends who call ALL the time for any reason, dinner dates when i was away, phone sex with ex-lovers and plans to fuck (which he says he does for an ego boast and always stands them up), and most recently as a member of adultfriendfinder for the past 9 months! (he says he never met any cuz they were all hookers) I’m with him at his house almost every night and i check to see if he’s there late at ight when i’m not so he really doesn’t have the time except during work hours and he’s usually very busy. i feel crazed! is this all just an ego game or have i ever had a boyfriend for the past 31/2 years. by the way, he’s broken up with me over 5 times cuz my “accusations” make him so angry…or is it guilt? how can i find out the real truth? the worst part i that i match his criteria perfectly, yet he turns me down at least twice a week if not more cuz i turn him off with my constant questions. HELP! SAD AND HORNY
A: “Dump him, he’s probably fucking half the town and if you are horny, call me”

Q: “hey meni! i really need your advice… there is this guy that i have had a thing for since august. i’ve been with a lot of guys since then but i still really want him. i dont know him well and only talk to him through the internet, and havent gone up to him in person. i get a lot of guys but people have told me stuff about him and my ways wont work to well with him, i dont think. people say hes the kinda guy that is reeeally hard to get and that if he knows a girl has a thing for him he wont pay her any attention. so how am i supposed to get him to notice me but yet not let him know i’m interested??? got any tips on how i could get him druling without thinking i’m a slut???”
A: “Flirt. Smile at him, but don’t talk to him. You better look good if you wanna get him. Talk to his friends, he’ll get jealous and approach you eventually”

Q: “i dont have a boyfriend but i have someone in mind.the thing is i dont know how to get him?we full around and every thing but it just never goes any further. i ask him if we could be more but he says that i am to young. but i think if i am old enough for him to fool around with than why cant he date me. i like him alot how can i get him please help” Far
A: “He’s using you. Do you wanna get used up by this clown? Find a guy who likes you and will date you, and don’t chase this hero”

Q: “hey man, i have a problem, ok my girl friend is really all about god, I am for sure not. I respect that and all but it is all ways talked about. The other night i went down on her for the first time, and it was cool at the time and today she said the devil took her over, and stuff like that and she doesnt want to be phisical at all, and she doesn’t want to go on my bed any more, cause of that happening there, i am really wierded out, but i like her a lot and i dont want to hurt her… What the hell can i do????”
A: “Dump her. Why do you wanna deal with that crap? She’s psycho and doesn’t put out. I can see fucking a psycho chick, but she’s not putting out, dump her ass”

Q: “Meni, how much emphasis should a person put on the “chemistry” in a relationship? Sometimes I find a woman I have fantastic chemistry with, and we screw like animals. She and I could be lovers yet other parts of our lives don’t mesh too well and I know we’d have trouble down the line. Then I meet someone who is very compatible with me and has all the good things I’m looking for in a potential long-term partner, but the sexual chemistry is kinda lacking. It’s kind of difficult to find a partner who had both the chemistry and has their shit together, you know what I mean? What should I do? Which do you think is more important in a long term partner, the chemistry, or the real life compatibilities?” Doug in Florida
A: “Long term? real life compatibilities. If I were you, and living in Florida, stay single, play the field, till you are in your late 30s. Then look for someone who is very compatible, but may be lacking. Why not find the perfect woman? with sexual chemistry and has her shit together? Oh wait, there is no perfect woman. Keep banging till you don’t look so good, then find someone to settle down with.

Q: “A couple of months ago I cheated on my girlfriend by having a threesome with her mum and her mums best friend her mum is now pregnant what should I do” Kevin
A: “Are you British? Is the mum hot? No daddy around? Keep fucking the mum, and the mum’s friend. Hell, impregnate your girlfriend too. Then you can be on Springer”

Q: “I have been involved with my current partner for 3.5 years and still to this day think of my x-boyfriend. Do you think that is normal and is that the person I am supposed to be with?” Tracie
A: “Your current guy, is not Mr Right. You x may not be. What do you miss about him? I think you should lose this current guy, and see what happens. You didn’t say how much you like your current guy, 3 1/2 years is a long time, sounds like Hell for you.”

A: “Dude, thank god its only a chick. Time heals all wounds. Now you know what I say relationships suck. You might be fucked in the head for while. If you can’t get it out of your head soon, dump her.”

Q: “what do men really want from a girl? sex, love or both or just fuck friends??” anonymous
A: “Real men? Fuck friends. Most sissy men? Love”

Q: “hey, i was wondering, how do u get a guy to just tell you that he likes u and get him to ask u out?” anonymous
A: “Why don’t you ask him out? Get with it SISTER. Flirt with him, smile when you see him, make good eye contact, and bend over in front of him”

Q: “”I found out my baby father cheated on me with 6 females. I give him everything he wants. money, sex (all ways) cooked food, clothes, everything. Is it about how much pussy he can get without getting busted.” anonymous
A: “He’s a man. Out there banging everything. You give him money? sex, food? clothes? honey, I feel bad, one word comes to mind, SUCKER. But if you put up with it? You deserve it”

Q: “”The man that I’m with now doesn’t satisfy me in bed. but I love him.I don’t want to tell him and hurt his feelings. what should I do.” Rissa-DC
A: “Did you ask the question below too? Tell him, who cares about his feelings. If he’s a real man, he will take the info and use it and not cry about it.”

Q: “the man that I’m with now he is sweet, gives me what I want. He wants to marry me. I had sex with him once but he doesn’t satify me. what should I do? anonymous
A: “Marry you? If you marry him, you will leave him in 4 years. Find the sweet guy who makes you wet, and you’ll be happier. Maybe you can marry him, and cheat on him, why not? Do you have my cell number?”

Q: “Meni, I’m dating probably the only 30 year old virgin in the USA. Really, this is no shit. She’s super nice, and has big jiggly tits that I bite on all the time. Other than that, I feel like I’m dating a nun. I’m a good looking guy and was used to getting blow jobs and fucks whenever I wanted… I like this woman, and I respect her values, but I wish she’d loosen up just a bit… I feel like sex or even blow-jobs will never happen. I have a feeling she’d be a total rampant slut if she gave in just once. What can I do?
A: “Dump her”

Q: “I am ready to have a lover — open up my marraige–my husband is willing too–after 15 years we are bored–we are both excited about living some separate sex life time–it will enhance what we have I think already, too. Comments? anonymous
A: “Sounds like a last ditch effort to save the marriage, try it, are you hot? i want a piece”

Q: “Can you love someone and want to be with that person but still want to date other people” jsduster
A: “Sure, you have love, and you have lust”

Q: “how long will i stay with my boyfriend doug?” anonymous
A: “For as long as you put up with his cheating and lying”

Q: “my wife doesn’t love me anymore,but doesn’t want to lose the house. what should i do” pistoff in az us
A: “Divorce her NOW”

Q: “I’m trying to impress this chick but she barely gave me her number! And to top that off, she looks like a skank! Should i have her whacked or what? Chris, Ca. USA
A: “Don’t kill her. He who cares least wins, never call her, and in bars, don’t look at her”

Q: “What is the best kind of date to take a girl on if you want to get some at the end of the night?” anonymous
A: “Take her to your house, buy liquor, get her lit”

Q: “”Will I fall in love” anonymous
A: “Yes”

Q: “me and my girlfriend have been seeing each other for 5 months, we really love each other but recently i moved, she calls it long didstance now but i only call it a simple 8 miles, recently we havent seen each other very much and our relationship is based off the phone, its not that way because we choose it to be but because her parents wont let us see eachother that much. Were both under age by about a year, so theres nothing we can do about it, but every time she comes to see me or we go to the movies she has to take her little brother, she’s not allowed out of the house because of the kid, her parents claim that its not fair that she gets to go out and have fun while the kid has to sit at home but thats like they are punishing her because her brother has no life. And i cant ever come to see her cause her parents complain that they are to tired to have anyone over at thier house, i understand every now and then but every day is stupid. and every day they come up with stupid rules like if wee see each other two days in a row we cant see each other the third day, or shes no longer allowed to talk on the phone and watch TV at the same time. Her parents are controlling our relationship. And right now i just dont know what to do. I really do not want to break up, so is there any way to get around this problem?” anonymous
A: “Dude, young love is rough, her parents run her life, she is young. Work thru it. Don’t be in hurry. Ride a bike”

Q: “i have been dating this girl for 3 years and plan to be married but she has no interest in sex. She doesn’t like foreplay and we maybe have sex once or twice a month if that. what should i do” anonymous
A: “Dude, what you have is a friend, not a girlfriend. No interest in sex? You’ll eventually look for it outside of marriage. She doesn’t like foreplay? Who’s gonna blow you? Your dog? Come on bro, move on”

Q: “On the weekends my wife wants to have sex first thing when we get up, all I want to do is take a dump reading the Sunday comics (maybe even before having coffee). Any suggestions on how we can overcome this dichotomy of desires?” Esstee, New York
A: “Let her blow you while you dump”

Q: “Hey Meni, What are the typical signs of a guy cheating?”
AD from NJ
A: “Lipstick on his collar, he doesn’t’ want sex from you, he’s not around as much, he suddenly goes out with his friends more, he gets calls from girls, his cock smells like other girls pussies”

A: “Swinging is when a couple openly bangs other couples. No jealously, no greed. It happens cuz people love sex, and don’t think sex with others means infidelity of the heart. I’d like to hit a swingers bar with some ugly chick just so I can bang some guy’s wife.”

A: “No, leave it a fantasy. It will ruin your relationship. Jealousy will set in. Just go your seperate ways now”

Q: “Hey Meni, just a quick question between men. Why is it that women have a need to sleep in bed with there male friends, it may be innocent but what is it. it would be like me saying to her, “Meni`s coming over, and we`re gonna take a nap together ” hee hee !!! what the heck is that all about anyway and especially if the girl who has a boyfriend at the time, and the so-called
friend is her X-boyfriend of 5 years and the girlfriend insists that theres nothing going on with the friends part while there in bed, no touching, kissing no sleeping around, and if there`s nothing going on what`s the obsession on sleeping in bed with a guy who`s not your boyfriend but in fact, “only” she say`s a “good friend” a person needing your great knowledge, Crystal`s X, N.J.
A: “Dude, she’s fucking him, ok, maybe just blowing him, ok maybe just handjobs. That is bullshit, chicks sleeping with their ex’s while having a boyfriend. Trust no one. Start sleeping with girls, say you are just friends with them, and nail them. Tell your chick to cut the shit or hit the fucking highway, there is too many chicks out there to worry about one.”

Q: “My husband caught me in a embarising position with my boyfriend, so know I am looking for a quick divorce can you advice” Tracy, UK
A: “YOU WHORE!!!, ok, just kidding, I’m not to judge, next time get divorced, then fuck around. Do you have a yellow pages in the UK?????? Look up, Attorneys”

Q: “I’ve been seeing the same girl for over four years, the sex is always good, but about a month ago she cut me off. No reason or anything, I can’t even touch her any more. Any explanation would be grateful. Thanks” W.M. Montgomery
A: “Ask her why, I think she’s banging someone else. Or did you gain alot of weight and now she finds you unattractive? Did she get fat? Communication is important. Get out now, its over. Sorry, acknowledge, move on.”

Q: “Does Adam have a girlfriend? Has he had one recently? True love?” some idiot
A: “Who the fuck is Adam? The guy who banged Eve?”

Q: “Hi Meni! I am female 26 and have just come out of a 3 year relationship. We loved each other but fought all the time. I left him because he didn’t want to live with me full time or get married. He still rings me and says he loves me but he hurt me too much. He was over 10 years older than me and I thought he was the one. He was incredibly loyal and honest which I loved. The sex wasn’t good but we loved each other with a passion. What do you think?” lost Aussie
A: “He’s loyal yet doesn’t want a commitment? He’s 10 years older? Sex wasn’t good, its only gonna get worse. Move on, you had one shot at love, with him. Fight all the time? Sounds like love, NOT. Move on”

Q: “Meni I hope You can help me. I am seeing a guy- my age 28, in another state. He adores me and would be a great partner and lover. It’s only early days but I’m confused as I’m established and he still hasn’t finished his studies and hasn’t got any money. I know he would be loyal and a great partner but I’m scared to continue with him because I am searching for someone like me, attractive, established. I still want some freedom, travel time alone – partying but I don’t want to hurt him because he’s been so wonderful and I can be happy with him. I just wished he had money. What do I do?” confused
A: “Money? Money is the root of all evil. Keep your freedom, use him for Booty Calls”

Q: “I am 14 and currently dating an 18 year old. I recently took his virginity and I really care about him. I was really good friends with all his friends until recently. Around the time I took his virginity his friends got really resentful. I could explain it as just that, resentment. But I want to dig deeper. I want to know why guys react like this. I also would like to know if there is any way to ease the tension between his friends and I? It would hurt me more than anything to have to be apart from my boyfriend because his friends and I can’t get along.” EmilyRose
A: “First off, 18? 14, sounds like JAIL. 18 yo virgin losing it to a 14 yo girl? LOSER. His friends don’t want him in a relationship. Maybe they are gay? Or maybe they are just immature guys. Honey if you are 14, why are you having sex? Too young.”

Q: “God. After reading your vaginal fisting thing, now I’m interested. Ok. I have been dating a guy (Australian) for 2 years, great friend of mine before, and I am intensely attracted to him and vice/versa. He’s got a muscular sinewy build, rugged features. I like the body. He’s even got a nice sized schlong. The problem is he’s an introvert which would have made me thought it would be great but the sex (he’s actually my first too) is just so-so. It’s not god awful, but I’m pretty sure all those movies I see with women thrashing around could happen and that isn’t the case for us. He’s done oral on me, regular sex, many many many position in many places. Like I said the sex isn’t awful but just not to the level I expected it to be at. We’ve been having it for like 8 months now. And it’s never really improved to where I feel ecstasy. And to top it off, his best friend who is really gorgeous (an actor) but kind of a dickhead has been quietly coming on to me and I have a feeling he would be incredible. I almost think I’ve given off vibes he’s picked up on that I’m needing some major fulfillment I’m not getting. Should I go for the friend? I love my guy but I’m nearing 25 and I waited before I lost my virginity and I’m getting way frustrated. I’d never leave my guy but I want some wild moan my brains out sex. Advice?” Margaret, Manhattan
A: “Dump the boyfriend, bang the friend, he sounds like me”

A: “Why rely on a partner to give you happiness? I don’t need a crutch to be happy. I am happy. Maybe you need someone to complete you, I don’t. I want to be free to do whatever I want. Is that bad? The divorce rate, the cheating, the lies, how many marriages are clean? Good Luck Champ!”

Q: “Meni, I read the reply to “”needing love in Kansas”” So is that what broke up your marriage, lack of sex? So is this what happens when you get married? I’m involved with some one now and sex is awesome! He wants to get married, but I’m so afraid of everything going down hill from the get go. Any advice on staying happily married?? Or is this question falling on deaf ears? What kind of girls would you or your brother have as a “keeper”, not a one night stand but one you would dedicate yourself to?” Curious Nat
A: “What broke up my marriage? We didn’t get along. Don’t get married. All jokes about marriage, aren’t jokes, they are TRUE. A keeper? She’s have to be smart, rich, beautiful, great in bed, and extremely loyal to me. Introduce other women to our sex life, 3 somes, orgies. Anything I miss?”

Q: “I see when you answered my question you say you only love once and I lost, is that what happened to you? BC – Texas
A: “No, L.L. Cool J song, ‘One shot at Love’, hee hee”

Q: “I am currently involved w/a new guy. I have an x who I feel I still have feelngs for. Any advice? BC- Texas
A: “Only date the new guy, don’t sucker him into thinking you guys are an item. Find a guy who will make you FORGET about the X. Move on, you got one shot at love, you lost. You’ll find someone else. Trust me.”

Q: “Hey Meni. I’m considering having an extramarital affair. My wife and I never have sex anymore, and a man has needs, as I’m sure you know. I’m pretty sure I don’t want to get a divorce, for the sake of our child. Do you think I should suggest an open marraige, or should I just go find what I need, and what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. I think we’re still good friends, even though she lies quite a bit to me lately. We’re both in our 20’s and have sex pretty infrequently, like once a month or so. Or is marraige just an inherently screwed institution to begin with? needing love, Kansas
A: “Marriage can SUCK BAD. Dude, divorce, and share custody. I was in the same situation. Get out of the marriage. Take care of your child. You will be miserable if you stay married. I don’t believe in cheating. Maybe throw the open marriage idea at her, but that sounds even worse for you child. Get the divorce, see your child regularly, and find lots of love”

Q: “Meni, what do you think of inter-racial relationships?” Spike Lee
A: “It’s all GOOD”

Q: “Have you ever had a special someone in your life? Have you been married or in love yourself?” Lisa, California
A: “I have had people who I thought were special in my life, and probably were. I was married, once. I think I was in love, but not sure. I think love lasts forever, and I don’t love any girls now. All my love is for my daughter, my family and my true friends. Does that make me a bad person?”

Q: “OK, Meni, how ’bout this? How important do you think sex is to a relationship. Let’s say a girl is with a guy who is a terrific guy, treats her probably better than he should, and is really devoted to her. But the sex is well, pretty blah. A girl is lucky to find a guy who cares so much about her, but what to do in this situation. Seriously, now, can a girl make a guy a better lover or is this something guys have to be born knowing?” EarthGoddessGurl, KY
A: “Sex is very important. If the sex sucks, you will leave. Guarantee. Make him a better lover? Sure you can, I see a kindler Meni in this answer. I could easily say, drop the zero, get with a hero. But your boy can get better. Men can be born with sexiness. But just the act of sex, tell him what you like. Where to touch you. How to use his tongue. Communication is important. There’s hope. If not, call me, I’ll service you.”

Q: ” Meni, One day you are going to meet a girl and fall passionately in love with her. You are going to fall so hard that you will be the next poster child for Monogamy. Funny thing is she is going to tell you that she is a “visual whale and she wants to do ’em all and not you.” You are out of your little bald-headed greek mind if you think you are ever going to find happiness with your tainted views. I would really like for you to explain long-distance relationships to me. It sounds like you know a little bit about everything. OH WISE ONE!!” Love, You know who
A: “OK, big long answer. No I will not fall passionately in love with a girl I meet. I’m 29, I’ve been around, my plan, all my love to my daughter and family, and true friends. That does not make me a bad person. I say ‘I love you’ everyday to everyone. It cheapens the meaning for me. Joke is on you honey because nothing a girl can say will hurt me. Nothing. If she is a “visual whale and she wants to do ’em all and not you.” Fine. God Bless You. Your actions have no meaning over my life nor my family. I’m out of my mind if I think I’m going to fine happiness with my tainted views? Tainted?? What world do you live in? I have a realistic view. Read about marriage, read about crime, read of decadence, read about the evil in the world. I’m not tainted. Long distance relationships? Don’t work. They sound romantic, just like I can sound at the snap a finger. Next? Yes I do know a little bit about everthing. Jack of all trades and a master of none. Wise? sure, Chick called me ‘Fresh’ last night. 20 year old. That’s what makes my world go around. (Of course my family really does). Funny thing is, I’m not sure who you are.
[note: damn, I just proofread my answer and boy, do I need help]

Q: “I broke up w/my girlfriend 2 yrs ago and moved away to go to college. On a recent visit back home, I ran into her at a nightclub. I realized that I still love her, maybe even more now. Any advice.? P.S. she is single.” Mark, IL
A: “If you still are in college, and away from here a lot, do not go out with her. Long distance relationships don’t work. If you are living locally to here, give it a try. One last try. If it doesn’t work, move on, and enjoy your life. Good luck.”

Q: “Hey Meni, A little background 1st. I’m a inhibited, reserved, loving person. And I think I’m in love with a neo nazi kill em’ (If they don’t agree) type guy. What is your opinion? Can we co-exsist.” Spammy
A: “Sure, all that matters is the sex. Give him a chance, maybe he really is a nice guy. Sounds like he is good in bed”

Q: “I’m not terribly sure about your views on men and monogamy, Meni. Don’t you believe that men can be monogamous if they chose to be? I have to think that some men may simply find it much more fun to screw around. Still, can be a dangerous kind of game to play. Besides, there is something very comforting to a monogamous relationship.
What are your thoughts? ” DW
A: “You can choose to be monogamous, just as you can choose to eat rat. You can be comfortable in a monogamous relationship. But don’t you wanna nail the chick on the next commericial you see? How about the hot Fed Ex driver in Boca??? Chicks at the gym?? Strip Clubs? Night Clubs??? Good luck to your
monogamous endeavors. But for the most men, that is BORING. Good Luck my friend.

Q: “”I dated a stripper that wanted me to do a threesome with another stripper. Problem is, the stripper I was dating made up a f*cking list of RULES, you know…DO’s & DON’Ts…I didn’t do it cause she took all the fun out of it. What lessons can I learn from this? Do a threesome, but not with the person you’re dating?”
A: “YES, it will ruin a relationship, threesomes, even with strippers. If you are banging strippers, why even go steady with one? Rules? Are your balls in her purse?”

Q: “I am seeing too many nice girls and cannot make a decision which one to go “”steady with””… What should I do????” JE
A: “Keep doing them all and keep doing what you have been doing. Steady???? Are you f*cking nuts???? Be the man, Metallica’s first album was Kill ‘Em All, I say ‘Do ‘Em All” If they all know you are sleeping around and they still screw you, God Bless You”

Q: “Hey Meni, great site. I can’t believe I’m gonna ask this question, if you think you can help me with it, I’d be thankful. Do you think men that are involved (physically, mentally, or emotionally) can be as honest as their partner?” Hailey, NY
A: “No. Men have testosterone, we are visual creatures, we look, and lust constantly for women. Confront your partner and he will lie. I don’t believe in monogamous relationships. Men are just lying to themselves. Monogamy is not in the cards for us. I feel bad the women need to deal with US.”